Marie Kondo (ESE): Personality Type Analysis

"Life truly begins only after you have put your house in order."

Marie Kondo is a Japanese organising consultant and author, known primarily for the KonMari method of tidying and has become a viral sensation with her 2019 Netflix show, "Tidying Up With Marie Kondo."

Marie Kondo has a long-standing obsessive interest in the organisation of her environment. From childhood she would leaf through home magazines and experiment with different organisational methods in her own home, and even preferred tidying and organising at school to playing with other children. As a result, she has broad knowledge of organisational systems and techniques and confidently recommends practical solutions for a wide range of situations. However, she considers emotional engagement (E) and aesthetic sensibilities (S+E) to be more relevant than practical considerations (P), as I will explain below:

"It is my hope that the magic
of tidying will help you create
a bright and joyful future."

Kondo is a friendly, cheerful woman who frequently demonstrates her emotions with expressive vocalisations and animated movements. On "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo", she is seen to greet clients enthusiastically, mirror clients' excitement, and empathise and cheer them during frustrating moments. She is excited to be able to help clients improve their homes and lead more joyful lives.

The hallmark of the KonMari method is the concept of tokimeku. Tokimeku is frequently translated into English as "spark joy", but the more literal translation is "[heart] throbbing/fluttering". In Japan, the word is usually used in the context of falling in love, and Kondo's use of it in regards to tidying and home organisation is a comprehensible but idiosyncratic decision that reflects the paramount importance she places on emotional experiences.

"I chose this standard for a reason. After all, what is the point in tidying? If it's not so that our space and the things in it can bring us happiness, then I think there is no point at all. Therefore, the best criterion for choosing what to keep and what to discard is whether keeping it will make you happy, whether it will bring you joy." -- "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up"

Tokimeku is a concept that falls within the realm of E, and its association with a personal, physiological experience, rather than a "meaningful" one, suggests a concurrent emphasis on S. This makes Alpha Socialite (ESE or SEI) a likely type for her.

The visceral nature of tokimeku is important to Kondo; it's not enough that you simply like the way something looks, it's necessary to physically interact with the item and keep or discard it based on your physical sensations. Kondo demonstrates the process:

She also emphasises the importance of physically interacting with objects in order to develop a positive relationship with them in the first place, whether it's learning to like essential items that don't 'spark joy' or learning to appreciate personally-unappealing possessions of family members.

"I decided to give her a homework assignment. 'If you don't like something that belongs to someone else, the rule is not to look at or pay attention to it. But if you just can't help seeing your husband's things and they really bother you, then I want you to reach out and actually touch them. For example, you could pick up a figurine or run your finger lightly over the cover of a book. It doesn't matter how, but touch it and look at it carefully for at least a whole minute.'

[...]  If you cannot avoid seeing certain things, then try facing them head-on. Start by touching them. If Y had only looked at her husband's things without touching them, she would never have been able to see them as anything other than toys. Once she held it in hand, however, the object became real. A figurine, for example, was no longer an anonymous samurai but the great leader Takeda Shingen. This alone can reduce aversion to such objects by half." -- "Spark Joy"

Her emphasis on physical interaction suggests strong, likely valued S with concurrent emphasis on E.

Due to her focus on tokimeku, her tidying and organisation recommendations can be out of sync with conventional wisdom. The actual tidying process is inefficient in terms of movement and energy. Every item in the house is handled multiple times, and some of the routines she recommends for maintaining a tidy house involve double-handling (for example, filling and emptying your purse on a daily basis). These are purposeful decisions that have their own advantages but nonetheless indicate valued E and weak, subdued P.

Another out-of-sync aspect of the KonMari method is the choice to tidy by category, and in a specific order, rather than by location. By all accounts, this is very effective, but although Kondo arrived at the order through her own experimentation, she says she doesn't know how all of it works. Despite the idiosyncrasy, she created a method she was able to communicate and apply in a wide range of situations for a wide range of people, and this suggests normative (i.e. 2D rather than 1D) P. At the same time, the lack of clear understanding suggests weak P. Overall, this fits P3 best.

“Now imagine yourself living in a
space that contains only things that
spark joy. Isn’t this the lifestyle
you dream of?” 

Her attitude towards discarding based on whether or not an item "sparks joy" has at times led to decisions that ultimately made life harder, for example by discarding essential items:

"Take, for example, my vacuum cleaner. I got rid of it because it was an outdated model, and instead diligently wiped the floor with paper towels and rags. But in the end it simply took too much time, and I had to buy a new vacuum.

And then there was my screwdriver. After throwing it away, I tried using a ruler to tighten a loose screw, but it snapped down the middle. This almost reduced me to tears as it was one I really liked." -- "Spark Joy" 

Kondo's solution to avoiding discarding useful items is once again an emotional one. Her first suggestion is simply to hone your ability to sense joy:

"All these incidents stemmed from youthful inexperience and thoughtlessness. They demonstrated that I had not yet honed my ability to discern what brings me joy. Deceived by their plainness, I failed to realize that I actually like them. I had assumed that if something brought me joy, I would feel a thrill of excitement that made my heart beat faster. Now I see things differently.

Feelings of fascination, excitement, or attraction are not the only indications of joy. A simple design that puts you at ease, a high degree of functionality that makes life simpler, a sense of rightness, or the recognition that a possession is useful in our daily lives - these, too, indicate joy." -- "Spark Joy" 

Another suggestion she makes is about actually forcing yourself to feel joyful about items:

"I have a secret for raising our joy level for things we know we need but that fail to excite us: shower them with praise. [...] One theme of my regular lessons is appreciating every item we use. This is a highly effective way to hone our judgement. By the time my clients begin tackling such items as kitchen implements, they can declare quite confidently that an unremarkable frying pan or a plain old egg beater brings them joy." -- "Spark Joy 

This is another example of weak, subdued P and strong, valued E.

"The real tragedy is to live your entire life without anything that brings you
joy and never even realise it." 

As she is focused on the very much in-the-moment experience of tokimeku, her attitude towards discarding items is very dismissive of reasons for keeping items that are based on something having been important in the past, nostalgia, relationships with other people, concern about needing something in the future, or otherwise any attachment that is not rooted in your immediate experience or lifestyle. Adding to this a personal tendency to take action and assume it will work out, we have a picture of weak, subdued, likely vulnerable T, subdued R, as well as strong, likely 4D F.


The KonMari Method itself is designed to guide and motivate the tidier through a series of emotionally impactful exercises. This is not limited to simply physically interacting with each object in search of tokimeki. Before tidying begins, tidiers are asked to think about their "ideal lifestyle" that they hope tidying will facilitate.

"As you continue to explore the reasons behind your ideal lifestyle, you will come to a simple realisation. The whole point in both discarding and keeping things is to be happy. It may seem obvious, but it is important to experience this realisation for yourself and let it sink into your heart." -- "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up"

“The question of what you want to
own is actually the question of how
you want to live your life.” 

 Her books are replete with emotionally-charged anecdotes from herself and her clients, and shares these anecdotes to help clients in person as well. The process of tidying is also riddled with moments to shock the tidier into rethinking the possessions that they own, for example placing all items from a single category into one large pile.

"Only when you are actually are confronted with how much exactly you have, you start to realize [...] what you need to do." -- "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo", S1E1

She also supports her clients to learn how to experience tokimeku, a demonstrates a nuanced understanding of how different people physically and mentally experience their emotions. Her superior understanding and ability to turn it into practical application suggests strong, likely valued, likely 4D E.

While personally placing a high value on tidiness, expresses strong opinions and enjoys giving advice, she is very clear that she opposes coercion in tidying. Tidiers are advised to ignore the mess of family members and focus only on their own space. Kondo relates that when she was younger she believed tidying would make everyone happy and tried to reform her family members, but found it resulted in negativity. When working with clients who have committed to the tidying process, however, she can be quite strict. In the first episode of "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo", one of the clients observes, "You look sweet, but on the inside you really mean business." A combination of proactive helpfulness (or "bossiness") with a wish to avoid negative emotions and an attitude of live-and-let-live in personal relationships suggests strong F and linear-assertive temperament within the Alpha Quadra.


Kondo fully expects that changing the emotional atmosphere of you environment by tidying will also lead to positive changes in other aspects of your life. Some of this is basic on somewhat mystical ideas rooted in Shintoism but much of it is the idea that your emotional state sets the tone for everything else in your life; both in the sense that happiness begets happiness and that orderliness that "sparks joy" is actually a necessary condition for moving on in your life.

"When I ask my Japanese client, 'What kind of room do you want?' for some reason many of them say, 'A room that will help me attract love and get married.' I am not an expert on how to increase your luck at love or marriage through tidying. However, I often hear from my client that their love lives went more smoothly once they had tidied up. The reasons for this are varied. For some, overcoming an inferiority complex about tidying instilled confidence, making the person more proactive about love. For others, tidying up has increased the spark in their relationship so that they pop the question. I also receive reports that as a result of tidying, my clients have decided to terminate a relationship. No matter the direction of the outcome, it is clear that tidying can also help us set out love life in order." -- "Spark Joy" (emphasis hers)

Kondo particularly focuses on the positive changes that tidying and the resulting environment that "sparks joy" can bring to family relationships. The consistent emphasis on your own emotional state being the driver suggests that E is valued and R is subdued.

“The true purpose of tidying is, I believe, to live in the most natural state possible.
Don’t you think it is unnatural for us to possess things that don’t bring us joy or
things that we don’t really need? I believe that owning only what we love and
what we need is the most natural condition.” 

In summary:

• Marie Kondo's pervasive and multi-faceted emphasis on emotional impact and emotional states indicates strong and valued E, and her readiness to communicate her own internal states (and the frequency with which she does so) indicates E1. Her emphasis on the physiological experience of emotions as well as their particular relationship with one's lifestyle also suggests strong, valued S2.

• Kondo's implicit assumption that positive emotions will lead to positive relationships indicates R in the Id block, especially R7.

• Her practicality indicates a tendency to stronger S and a tendency to use P, while her more vague understanding of her method and tendency to abandon practical measures for emotional ones suggests weak P3.

• Kondo's proactive and decisive nature, along with her assumption that things will work out fine after acting, indicates a linear-assertive temperament, 1D T and 4D F, making them good candidates for T4 and F8.

• Her strong preference for, and commitment to, experiencing positive emotions, along with her appreciation for structure and live-and-let-live attitude, indicates that she belongs to the Alpha Quadra.

Altogether, this suggests that the most likely type for Marie Kondo is ESE.

To find out more about ESE, click here.

If you are confused by our use of Socionics shorthand, click here.


Sources
"The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up"
"Spark Joy"
"Tidying Up with Marie Kondo"